An Open Letter To My Letter Opener

I’m an old-fashioned kind of girl. To me, few things are more rewarding than getting an actual piece of paper mail, instead of my usual onslaught of emails and texts.When I get a piece of paper mail, I really try to make a thing of it by using you, my trusty letter opener. You’re one of those letter openers that looks like a little medieval sword, and I think that’s really special and fun. Even if the mail ends up being just a coupon or a bill, I love slashing the envelope open with my Lil Excalibur!Unfortunately, sometimes I misplace you, my beloved letter opener. I still get a rush of excitement from opening envelopes with my thumb, but its not quite the same.I’m not saying that everyone should invest in one just like you, but it’s sad to see people opening emails day in and day out with no sense of adventure. Even if people give me weird looks when I use you to slash open mail, I still love you.Stay shiny, stay sharp, and keep helping me slice Amazon Prime tape.