Dining Halls Add Parsley To Every Meal To Prove They’re Fancy

BAY STATE DINING HALL—Students have caught on to BU Dining Service’s strategy of adding a little sprinkle of parsley to every meal, in order to create the illusion of an elegant dining experience.“They’re not fooling anyone” says Brian Miller (CAS ‘17) about this scandal. “You can’t pass off basic mac and cheese as something it’s not, just by putting a little bit of green crap on it. It’s honestly kind of insulting. I’ve been to nice restaurants; I know what nice food looks like.”Students have started noticing the practice more frequently in recent months because parsley has been showing up on more unconventional dishes. Julie Patel (COM ’18) was particularly disturbed by it’s presence on her dessert. “I swear to GOD there was parsley on my bread pudding. I swear!”Multiple students have claimed that a pinch of parsley was tossed vaguely in their direction when they were just stopping in to grab a banana. Others were seen straining green bits out of their cereal milk with a spoon.At press time, a representative from BU Dining Services tossed a cloud of green garnish into the air as a distraction and disappeared before making any formal comment.