Terrified Students Wonder What In The World Could Possibly Have Stopped Elie Wiesel

BOSTON—A campus-wide e-mail sent yesterday confirmed that despite all of the other hardships that he has been through in his life, champion of humanity Elie Wiesel will has cancelled his lectures this Fall.“What could possibly stop Elie Wiesel?  He survived pretty much the worst thing ever,“ reported a bewildered Emily McCormick (CFA ’16).Wiesel, the author and subject of the autobiographical novel Night which chronicles his experiences in Nazi concentration camps, will not be engaging in his annual public lecture for undisclosed reasons."If he was able to get through all of that stuff he went through, then there must be some serious shit going on to stop him from giving one little speech,” said John Sisson (COM ‘15). “What on Earth could it be? Is it coming for us too? Whatever it is, if it took down Elie Wiesel, none of us stand a chance.”Members of the BU community are fear-stricken by the announcement that the Nobel Peace Prize, U.S. Congressional Gold Medal, and Presidential Medal of Freedom winner will not be making his annual presentation to share his life experiences and shine a golden ray of hope into their dismal lives.“The man survived a march from one concentration camp to another, in which he comes face-to-face with his belief in God, to say the least,” said Dara Mitchell (ENG '15). “He’s the toughest person alive. I didn’t think anything could stop him. What could stop him? He has to show up to speak. He’s just gotta.”At press time, members of the BU community are holding out hope that the lectures will still be held because no one knows what else to do.