New Undergraduate Class Experiences First Collective Hangover

CENTRAL CAMPUS—Yesterday night marked the first time that the BU Class of 2016 joined together with the greater Boston community to consume large quantities of alcohol and regret it in the morning.All across South Campus and in the heart of Allston, freshmen were seen traveling in packs from house to house, looking for party venues to inhabit.“Our party last night got pretty packed”, said a student living in Allston who asked to remain anonymous. “I didn’t even know a lot of the people who showed up. One of my friends brought his whole broomball team. By midnight I started noticing freshmen just walking in off the street, but by that point I was too drunk to care."  By 1:00 a.m., sources say that students at various parties began showing symptoms of over-intoxication, including loss of consciousness and vomiting.The impact of these start-of-the-year parties is felt annually on campus. "This is always a red-letter weekend for us,” said a representative from BU Emergency Medical Services. “They offer a bonus on the nights shifts of the first weekend because they know no one wants to do it.” Dennis Carlberg of Sustainability @ BU estimates that approximately 10,000 gallons of water were used flushing toilets by students after vomiting last night at parties across campus. While various BU departments may have been overwhelmed, local eateries flourished last night – an employee at Gigas Pizzeria in South Campus reports the sale of 200 slices of pizza last night. “My hands are tired from kneading dough”, said the employee.Mitzi Kane of Student Health Services estimates that, of students who went to house parties last night, approximately 80% will go out again tonight. “Here we go again,” said Mitzi. “Thousands of new students every year. It never ends.”The reality of the number of party-goers hit home this morning during breakfast when the campus’s usually bustling dining halls were seen completely uninhabited by hangover-affected students, with the exception of all of their roommates who decided to stay home last night and play video games.