“I’m Never Apologizing for My Jewish Comments” Me for the Rest of My Life Now.

By Paige Schwartz | Photo by Doran Steinfeld

If there is one thing Kanye is known for, it’s dropping absolute bars. And antisemitism. But bars first and foremost. He literally wrote “Graduation,” so it makes sense that there is absolute heat to be found in his delusional, withdrawal-induced raves on Twitter. He said he “loves when Jewish people come to me and say they can’t work with me.” Which is so funny, because that’s exactly what I told Doran when he tried to keep me out of the Bunion after I applied. Something about not wanting the competition of a much funnier Jewish person? But it’s okay, I threatened to remove his access to the hurricane machine if he didn’t accept me.

Anyways. I often also feel like I am martyred for my amazing wit and comedic talent, much like how Kanye feels, I can only assume. Being a 5’7” man is already tough, but imagine also being wildly racist and everything-phobic. Like, pick a struggle. But when I make a joke that bombs at a Bunion meeting, the media (everyone who stares at me in silence) also is quick to lambast me (not give a pity laugh) and call me homophobic (ask if I’m actually gay because my joke was so bad).

But, like Kanye said, I’m never apologizing for my Jewish comments! Hearing that phrase opened a new door in my life. Why should I feel bad for a bad joke when I could just tell everyone who didn’t laugh that they’re antisemitic?