Awkward! Freshman Walks In On Roommate Running Drug Cartel

WEST CAMPUS–Last semester, Wendy Lee (CGS '23) arrived at her double in Sleeper Hall only to be greeted by her roommate running a multi-million drug cartel from the comfort of her bed. Awkward!Brenda Singer (QST '22), her flustered roommate, asked Wendy to close the door as she scrambled to snort the leftover coke. Wendy lashed out, asking Brenda to please stop participating in illegal activities when she was around, and to keep the cocaine on her side of the room only. "Like, I know she does this kind of stuff when I'm not around," Wendy told The Bunion. "But this time she forgot to put a sock on the door."According to Wendy, Brenda often has "friends" over who take large, heavy packages from her to give to other "friends," as "presents." "It's not like she has that many friends," Wendy added,  "and some of them look way too old to be college students." The Bunion confirmed that Wendy's "friends" were, in fact, 30-something drug traffickers and notorious drug lords including "Boston George" Jung, a former associate of Pablo Escobar. After multiple incidents of Wendy walking in on Brenda's business activities, Wendy had no choice but to get Jackson, the RA, involved. Jackson Jackson (CAS '20) arranged a meeting between the girls that he moderated. At the end of the meeting, the two girls, with Jackson's input, were able to come up with some ground rules for the drug cartel:

• - Odorless drugs only. 
• - Wendy's "friends" have to take off their shoes when entering the room.
• - No business dealings past 10 PM on school nights.

The Bunion asked what Wendy took away from the whole incident. "I'm glad it happened," Wendy said. "I think it grew our bond as roommates. And I apologized for overreacting. After all, she puts up with the underground gambling ring I run."