BU On Broadway Takes Credit For Ocasio-Cortez’s Crimes

FACEBOOK—BU On Broadway, via press release, has confirmed to being the sole perpetrator behind the production and subsequent release of a viral video featuring 2018 New York US Representative and BU alum Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez dancing on the roof of the CAS building.Their press release, which can be seen as the Facebook profile picture of every current and past member of BUOB, states as follows:“The grasp of BU On Broadway is long and ever stretching. Those enrolled in Boston University can attest to it. However, the complete control of the BU student body is merely one of the many cogs in the machine that is BUOB. We have outgrown our facade. We proudly shed it. We are the New World Order. Sister Ocasio-Cortez’s video is your first and final wake-up call. We have merged our pulse with your government. There are many like her. Like-minded individuals that dance ‘innocently’ on top of college buildings. Or are they high school buildings? America, you may never know. But you WILL know of US. All of the world’s nations will know our name. They will dance to our tune. They will enjoy our surprisingly entertaining and refreshing takes on classical Broadway shows. We are the Lights. We are the Scene. Expect the Action.”The FBI, at press time, has announced their senior official, Shaw Moore, will be leading an investigation into the released statement and the BU organization. Moore, who was present at the conference, offered a few words for BUOB.“Even if what they've done is illegal, which it is, I'm afraid I would have a lot of difficulty endorsing an enterprise which is as fraught with genuine peril as I believe this one to be,” said Moore. “The thing that distresses me even more about this whole thing is the spiritual corruption that can be involved. These dances and this kind of music can be destructive. I'm afraid BU On Broadway is going to find most of the people in our nation are gonna agree with me on this.”