No One Agrees With Anthony

MARSH PLAZA—Ever since he voiced his opinion on The Big Bang Theory to the last possible student on campus, it’s official – not a soul agrees with Anthony Risotto (COM ’18).“The best show in the history of television!” said Risotto to a crowd of people, who all shook their heads.“I’ve never met a person with worse views on absolutely everything,” said  Emma King (CAS ’18), who hates Risotto the least. “Garfield is his favorite cartoon and president.”Despite the lack of positive response from people, Anthony, whose preferences to go by Tony were ignored, continues to express his views.“Strawberry ice cream is clearly the best. I loooved the fourth Shrek movie, I hate music, want to go see American Idol on Ice?”While wearing a Shaquille O’Neill jersey, Risotto crossed over to a group of his non-enemies.“No,” said King before Risotto even opened his mouth.“I only wanted to ask if you all would like to get dinner. Warren Towers is where it’s at!” was the alleged reply.At press time, Anthony was trying to convince a group of dog walkers that cats really are the best pets.